This is no ordinary blog post. This is the tale of the most magical date I've ever been on.
Who's this prince charming you're asking yourself? In order to protect his identity from the predators of the world wide web, he's asked me to refer to him only as Jorge M. But I'll tell you one thing, he's a combination of Swiss chocolate and Peruvian aji that makes the chicas melt! This is the story of our beer-date.
At first, as we walked along the poopy, cat-infested streets of Jesus Maria, we were both feeling a little nervous. But luckily, Jorge knew how to break the ice. He began telling me all about his rabbit, Rabita (may she rest in peace), his history of misidentifying the gender of his guinea pigs, and the chaos that ensued as a result. Soon we were laughing and joking, and I felt my nervousness melt away.
As we were strolling along in search of beer, he made a surprise stop at a children's costume shop. The women behind the counter looked somewhat perplexed as to why 2 adults were browsing for children's costumes at 8:00 at night, and I have to admit, I wondered the same thing. What a mysterious man!
Next, we popped around the corner and into a small, cozy restaurant. We began to browse through the menu under the blinding florescent lights, and soon came across a problem. "Senora," he said, "do you have beer here?"
Accompanied by a blatantly judgmental look, the senora, replied "No, only soda."
"Thanks, but we'll be going." And out we went, back into the night.
We walked on, to the next restaurant we saw. However, there were a couple of indicators that it wasn't actually a restaurant. My first clue was the fact that they sold cigarettes. They did have food, but it included whole loaves of ham and 5-lb bags of sugar. But he decided it would do!
First, he bought some toilet paper to take back to his apartment. It was the soft, double-ply kind, so I knew right away that he wasn't cheap! However, I was a little confused as to why he then bought us the cheap brand of beer. But I was reassured again when I found out that he had splurged to buy the big cans! He's definitely a keeper!
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| Me and Mr. M |
We sat down at the table. I say the table because it was the only one there. We sipped our lukewarm beers as we talked and got to know each other better. He began to tell me about his past romances, especially about a particularly recent one that was fresh in his mind. It involved a make-out session with a giant guinea pig (he thinks it might have been male, but like I said, he doesn't have a great track record when it comes to identifying the gender of guinea pigs).
As the night went on, our romance began to blossom. We even planned our future wedding! Let's just say it involves gas station sushi and Brahma beer (the big cans!) so make sure you clear your calendar because you're going to want to be there!
Unfortunately, the beer and the night all had to come to an end. My life almost came to an end with it, as he pulled me across the street into oncoming traffic and I nearly got hit by a speeding taxi! I like to think that he didn't do it on purpose, though.
I can tell this is going to be the beginning of a great relationship! I'll keep you all posted! For our second date he's planning on taking me to the movie, but in order to save a little money (he's very smart with his finances) we're just going to stand outside the theater door and ask the people coming out what the movie was about and whether they liked it. Maybe we'll even be able to snag some leftover popcorn and gummi bears!
Stay tuned to find out!
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